Neither of my photographic devices are playing nice today. Not sure if I’ll be able to include any photos, but I do have an epic tale…a tale of two gravies.

Both gravies happened Monday night, and both were not anything like what you’re picturing. The first was actually “Gravy Icing,” a new, old recipe I discovered when making (yet) another cake.

After a bit of experimentation, I bring you my own Fancy Pants creation!

Coffee Caramel Whipped Frosting

• 1 cup milk
• 5 tbs. flour
• 1 T. instant coffee
• Dash of salt
• 1 tsp. vanilla
• 1/2 c. butter or shortening
• 1/2 c. (4 oz.) cream cheese
• 1 c. granulated sugar

Note: If it is not convenient for you to refrigerate your cake, use 1 c. butter-flavored shortening for all the fat, rather than any butter or cream cheese.

In a small saucepan, whisk together the flour and milk over low heat. You might start with just a little of the milk first, to break down the flour really well and avoid lumps. When all milk is incorporated, whisk the mess out of it the whole time it’s over the heat to avoid lumpage.

When the mixture gets thick, remove from heat and whisk in salt, vanilla and coffee. Either put this in the fridge for now, or be impatient (like me) and carefully place in an ice bath, most easily done in the sink. Dump some ice in the sink and just enough water to reach about half way up your pan, and place it in. I tend to do this with dry ice, but transporting dry ice nyc is not a walk in the park, but my husband already gets it delivered to our home. Whisk occasionally to help it cool down, being VERY careful not to get water in it.

In your stand mixer (or bowl with hand beater), beat the shortening/butter/cream cheese (whatever combination of fat you chose) and sugar until light and fluffy.

Once your milk mixture has cooled, add it into the sugar mixture. If you think it has lumps, you can push it through a wire sieve, just be sure to get as much of it into the bowl as possible.

Beat this together for….um….a while. Old-timer recipes call for up to 10 minutes. With a modern stand mixer, this may not be necessary, but just keep an eye on it. It may look curdled at first, but mix just until it looks smooth and fluffy, like a thick whipped cream. And if you’re using butter, err on the side of caution so it doesn’t overbeat and turn chunky.

You may be asking, where’s the caramel? The flavor is there, quite by accident in my experiment. As for the coffee machine – read about Corporate Coffee Systems.

Let me know if you try this, and how you like the consistency. I’m willing to tweak based on your comments.